Relationships Talk

Ayesha Curry has some strong opinions about what it takes to be a good spouse and a good parent. According to the chef and wife of basketball star Steph Curry, the key to her successful marriage is putting her husband before her kids.

“Putting ourselves first, and making sure that we make time for date nights and for each other,” the 29-year-old confessed in a recent interview with Hello Giggles when asked what had helped her and husband of almost eight years Steph stay together. “That’s been very important, as hard as it is. Because when you become a parent, you want to put your kids first, and we do, but we do it second to our relationship.”

Ayesha, who has kids Riley, 6, Ryan, 3, and Canon, six months, with Steph, went on to explain that “when our relationship is good, the kids are happy and they’re thriving and our family life is good.”

She also stressed that she doesn’t think it’s selfish to prioritize her marriage because “it’s making sure we set a strong foundation.”

During the interview, the mom of three said that she learned by example from watching both her and Steph’s parents. “Both of our parents are still married and have been married for 30-plus years, and [this is] the one thing that they both shared with us—some through learning it the hard way, some through just making sure that they do it.”

And Ayesha isn’t the only woman who has confessed to putting her husband ahead of her children. Back in 2005, author Ayelet Waldman was dubbed a “bad mother” and faced heavy backlash when she wrote a piece explaining how she loved her husband —  author Michael Chabon — more than their children.

Despite the criticism, however, the practice of focusing on your marriage first is something many psychologists and marriage therapists approve of, as a healthy relationship sets a good example for kids.