Relationships Talk

Dina Manzo got incredibly real about her life since The Real Housewives of New Jersey during a recent Q&A with fans on Instagram, revealing that she has suffered multiple miscarriages in recent months.

One fan asked Dina, “Do you wish you had more children?” To that, Dina replied, “Sometimes…I recently lost a few pregnancies but God is in charge not me.”

Dina did not provide any more details on this difficult time or the future of her baby plans. However, she did share her best advice on how to overcome adversity, which we can only imagine has helped her get through past hardships: “Take your time and feel the emotions but don’t live in [them]. Always try to find the good in it as well. Every situation usually has one even it it’s unexpected.”

Photo: @dina/Instagram Stories

Photo: @dina/Instagram Stories 

Dina has one daughter from her first marriage, Lexi Ioannou, who will turn 23 later this month.

The RHONJ alum revealed during an interview on Radio Andy’s Jeff Lewis Live in August 2018 that she and her longtime boyfriend, David Cantin, had gotten engaged. When asked by a fan on Instagram if the couple had finally gotten married, Dina continued to play it coy and answered “maybe” with a smiley face emoji. 

Photo: @dina/Instagram Stories 

Dina also shared on Instagram that she “just moved from Malibu to Newport” in California, but she still has a place in New Jersey, and she visits the Garden State often. Dina also talks to Teresa Giudice “all the time,” and she’s even “fine” with her rekindled friendship with Danielle Staub. Though Dina wasn’t so fond of Danielle during her time on RHONJ, she said on Instagram that she has “no beef” with her now. “That was a lifetime ago,” she said. 

Photo: @dina/Instagram Stories

Photo: @dina/Instagram Stories

Photo: @dina/Instagram Stories

And as far as Dina ever appearing on your screen again, she said she’s “just taking a break from TV right now.”

Catch up more with Dina from her appearance on Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen in April, below.

John Piper recently shared how singles who want to be married can keep marriage in perspective. | (Photo: Pexels)

Theologian John Piper has shared six ways single people who want to be married can keep their desire for marriage in proper perspective and refrain from “unrealistic notions” that such unions are the “key to happiness.”

In an “Ask Pastor John” podcast posted on desiringGod.org on Wednesday, the Reformed theologian answered the question: “How do I keep my desire for marriage, as a single person who would like to be married, in proper perspective?”

First and foremost, the desire for marriage is in proper perspective when it’s a desire for marriage for Christ’s sake, the pastor said, citing 1 Corinthians 10:31: “Whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”

“Desire pizza in the name of the Lord Jesus. Desire a glass of water in the name of the Lord Jesus. Desire sex in the name of the Lord Jesus. Desire marriage in the name of the Lord Jesus,” he explained.

Second, Piper said the desire for marriage must be carried, shaped, and sustained by faith. This, he explained, means “letting the desire be embedded in the confidence that God did not spare his own Son but gave Him up for you.”

Third, the desire for marriage is in proper perspective when “the sorrow of not having it does not sour into cynicism and bitterness,” Piper said.

“It’s not wrong to have sorrow,” he clarified. “But it is wrong not to rejoice and to live for others, and to become absorbed in cynicism and bitterness and self-pity.”

As his next two points, Piper said the desire for marriage must not “diminish zeal to glorify God with the freedom of singleness” and or hold “unrealistic notions that marriage is the key to happiness.”

“It’s not wrong to dream about the kinds of happiness a person may have in marriage,” he said. “But don’t let your desire intensify because you idealize marriage as Heaven on Earth. Not only is marriage not Heaven on Earth — it’s not Heaven in Heaven. It won’t be there: ‘In the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage’ (Matthew 22:30).”

Finally, Piper advised single people to become a part of a loving, Bible-preaching church: “That,” he said, “is a family that will last forever.”

Piper, who has been married to his wife, Noël, for over 50 years, frequently addresses the subject of marriage and has written several books on the topic.

Previously, he explained that God did not make marriage to last for eternity because its disappearance makes clear what has always been true — “that non-married people are the full beneficiaries of the greatest eternal joys.”

“Marriage ends because all its pleasures are preludes and pointers to something so much better than the human heart cannot imagine,” Piper concluded.

Advising those who never marry, Piper said: “The more you feel like you would miss it, the more you should rejoice that it will be replaced. With every taste or every dream, remember: this is only foretaste — only prelude.”

It’s that time of year! Tax time is always a stressful time, particularly for student loan borrowers, who already have massive bureaucracies and administrative headaches to contend with on a regular basis. But tax time can also be a useful opportunity for student loan borrowers to take stock of their student debt, their options for managing it, and potential pitfalls to be wary of. Here are some tips for this year as we enter tax season.

Disability Discharges For Federal Student Loans Are Now Tax-Free

Up until 2018, discharges of federal student loans on the basis of the borrower’s total and permanent disability were treated as taxable.  In other words, the discharged student loan could be viewed as “income” that the borrower earned during the year in which the debt was cancelled; the borrower would then have to be income taxes on that canceled debt. However, thanks to recent legislation, any federal student loan disability discharges that were granted as of January 1, 2018 should no longer be taxable under federal law.

Tax Deductible Student Loan Interest

The current federal tax code permits student loan borrowers to claim a portion of their student loan interest paid during the year as a deduction. If you made any payments on your student loans during 2018, you should received a “1098-E” statement from your student loan lender. The 1098-E will indicate the amount of interest that you paid during the year, and you could get a modest deduction as a result. However, the deduction is capped, and not everyone can benefit from it because it is phased out for higher income earners.

Shutdown-Related Impacts

Due to the partial government shutdown, the IRS is working with a significantly reduced staff. While this may not have a direct impact on some student loan borrowers, others may be significantly impacted. In particular, student loan borrowers who need to request a copy of their tax return (or their tax return transcript) in order to apply or re-certify for an income-driven repayment plan may encounter some delays. The online tool that allows borrowers to access their tax information on the U.S. Dept. of Education website also seems to be having issues. Borrowers in these circumstances who have deadlines (particularly those re-certifying for income-driven plans) should allow for plenty of time to account for shutdown-related delays and other snags. Some people may have to submit paper applications with alternative documentation of income (like a pay stub) if they cannot access their tax return or tax transcript.

Marriage Considerations

If you recently got married and you’re making payments on federal student loans, tax filing status as a married couple could make a big difference when it comes to your student loan payments. Several income-driven repayment plans (the Income-Contingent Repayment (ICR) plan, the Income-Based Repayment (IBR) plan, and the Pay As You Earn (PAYE) plan) factor in joint income with your spouse only if you file joint tax returns. However, under the Revised Pay As You Earn (REPAYE) plan, your federal loan servicer will factor in your spouse’s income regardless of how you file your taxes. REPAYE is generally less expensive plan ICR or IBR, but it may actually result in higher payments for some married couples than if they filed taxes separately and selected a different plan. Filing taxes as married-filing-separately, however, could also have tax consequences, including higher taxes for the household. In some cases, a more expensive annual tax bill could wipe out any associated student loan savings.

Divorce Considerations

While marriage can certainly impact your repayment options for federal student loans, the same is true for borrowers who have recently become separated or divorced. For income-driven repayment plans like ICR, IBR, PAYE, and even REPAYE, you may not have to provide your spouse’s income information at all if you recently became separated or cannot otherwise access that information – even if you filed taxes jointly on your last tax return.

Reducing Adjusted Gross Income

For income-driven plans like IBR, PAYE, and REPAYE, student loan payments are usually tied to the borrower’s Adjusted Gross Income (AGI) as shown on the borrower’s federal tax return. A person’s AGI is not their gross salary or gross income; it is inherently “adjusted” to take into account certain pre-tax deductions. AGI can be reduced by contributions to certain retirement accounts or Health Spending Accounts (HSA’s), for instance. Contributing more funds to retirement and HSA’s may be good financial planning in general – but it can also reduce student loan payments under income-driven repayment plans.

Considerations For Student Loan Borrowers In Default

The federal government has the authority to intercept federal tax refunds for borrowers who are in default on federal student loans.  This tax interception program is known as the “Treasury Offset Program” (“TOP”). The TOP permits the IRS to take your federal tax refund and apply it to your defaulted federal student loan. The only good news is that TOP seizures must be applied only to principal and interest – not to any collections charges or penalties. If you are anticipating receiving a tax refund this year and you are in default on your federal student loans, it may be prudent to cure your student loan defaults first (and there are federal statutory programs that can allow you to do that).

Negotiated Settlements of Student Loan Balances

Student loan borrowers can sometimes negotiate settlements for private or federal student loans that are in default. Settlements typically involve a lump-sum payment or series of payments for less than the full balance owed; in exchange, the lender agrees to waive or cancel the remaining portion of the balance. The lender gets a lot money up front, and the borrower doesn’t have to pay the full amount due. However, there is a potential downside to settling: whenever a debt is cancelled (such as through a negotiated settlement), lenders can issue the borrower a “Form 1099-C,” requiring that the borrower report the portion of the debt that was cancelled or waived as “income” for tax purposes. The 1099-C would be issued for the tax year during which the debt was fully or partially forgiven.

By way of example, let’s say that you have a $10,000 loan in default, and you and the lender agree to settle for $6,000. That means $4,000 of that loan balance is being cancelled via the settlement. However, you may get a 1099-C in the mail the following year – and you may have to pay additional taxes as a result. There are sometimes ways of minimizing or even eliminating any resulting tax, however;  for example, people who were insolvent at the time that the debt was canceled (meaning their total debts exceeded their assets) may not have to pay any taxes.

Talk to a Professional

Student loan law and tax law are complex, and these issues can be challenging to navigate by yourself. Making a mistake can cost you. Talk to the right professionals so that you get sound advice on how to proceed. That could be an attorney, a financial planner, or a Certified Public Accountant, depending on the specifics of your own unique circumstances. But get your questions answered, and then make the most of your options.

Many frown at the idea of keeping opposite sex friends after marriage or while in an exclusive relationship.

But we must agree that it might be quite difficult and impractical, especially for the sociable ones, to sever friendly ties after marriage.

What if there was a way to keep your single opposite sex friends without hurting your relationship?

Here are a few tips to help with that:

Establish clear boundaries

Before forging ahead with opposite sex friendship when you are in a relationship, you must be sure that you have clarified the boundaries with the friend in question.

For instance, some single ladies have a penchant for developing a thing for their married counterparts owing to a perceived sense of responsibility and commitment on the part of the latter.

However, establishing boundaries creates ‘guardrails’ for your marriage or relationship.

Set the sails aright

If you intend to keep an opposite sex friendship while in a working relationship, it is pertinent that precautionary measures are taken.

You must ensure that your spouse or partner knows your friend, reassure him/her of your unparalleled loyalty to the relationship and that there are no (potential) emotional attachments associated with the friendship.

Address your partner’s concerns

Post-marriage opposite sex friendship without precautionary strategies can potentially send your relationship to the grave.

It is important that you communicate with your partner and address his/her concerns on the said friendship, ensuring that the trust remains consolidated.

Ensure your partner is comfortable with the intensity of the friendship, the type of interactions you have with him/her and oblige with your partner’s conditions concerning same — even if it means aborting or significantly limiting the friendship.

Be communicative

Many marriages fail because of sheer carelessness and the failure of the partners to keep the communication lines open.

Erecting of a ‘wall of secrecy’ while indulging in opposite sex friendships readily spells doom for the relationship in question and can wrongly imply the partner is having an (extramarital) affair.

Know when to call it quits

Not many lovers feel secure on coming to learn of their partner’s opposite sex friends, hence, a conscious effort often has to be taken if the relationship at stake is to be preserved.

Knowing when to call it quits is one good way of ensuring that.

When ‘friendship’ starts leading to romantic fantasies, when you start pitching your partner against your opposite sex friend or comparing them, then the time is rife to let go of the friendship.

Reinforce your loyalty

Prior trust issues compounded by lack of proper communication in budding relationships are often detrimental to the union itself.

Reassuring your spouse or partner of your utter commitment and loyalty to the relationship, both verbally and by means of practical measures, might be a good way of successfully keeping an opposite sex friendship without hurting your relationship.

Include your partner in the friendship

If you must keep an opposite sex friend but find it difficult to keep up with your partner’s incessant suspicions, then you should consider including him/her in the friendship.

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