Relationships Talk

After months of struggling to make up her mind, it looks as though Khloe Kardashian may have finally dumped Tristan Thompson.

Or at the very least, she’s gearing up to the task of kicking his cheating ass to the curb.

We guess it’s better late than never, but the fact that Khloe took over six months to cut Tristan loose despite the fact that he cheated on her while she was pregnant with his child seems to indicate that she’s not thinking too clearly these days.

And that means she probably shouldn’t be offering romantic advice to other people.

But the ladies of the Kardashian clan aren’t huge on self-reflection, and thus, Khloe is dispensing wisdom regarding matters of the heart to her younger sisters.

As you may have heard, Kendall Jenner is dating Anwar Hadid these days, and it looks like she’s falling hard for the model/professional famous guy.

That can be a scary feeling, of course, so perhaps it should come as no surprise that Kendall turned to her big sis for advice.

In response, Khloe doled out some pro tips that were obviously intended not only for Kendall, but for all of the ladies of the Kard clan:

“Never ever play games with people,” said Guru Khloe in a group text.

“Even if you feel like you’re so vulnerable and stupid for telling someone how much you love them and how dope they are… Who the f*ck cares…”

“Ego doesn’t matter and our souls,” Khloe added.

“I love you guys so much! You guys are my heartbeat.” 

Clearly, there’s a lot to unpack here.

We’ll begin by commending Khloe for dispensing what sounds like herbal bag tag wisdom while often making zero sense at all.

We’re sure her heart was in the right place, but “Egos don’t matter and our souls” is literally not even a sentence.

Beyond that, Khloe has some pretty good points.

Life is too short to hide your feelings and hold back from expressing your heart’s desire.

That said, it’s also too short to waste time with sketchy baby daddies who can’t keep it in their pants even when their girl is at home preparing to give life to their child.

Just sayin’.

Khloe Kardashian: Why She SHOULD Leave Tristan Thompson, But Never Will

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You meet someone new and go on a great date. Afterward, you decide to send a text message to say how much fun you had. Unfortunately, you don’t hear back. All kinds of thought are running through your head: Does this person like me? Did my text go through? You ask your friends for relationship advice, but you’re still confused. What should you do when you don’t get a text back?

The Cheat Sheet reached out to April Masini, a relationship expert and founder of relationship advice forum Ask April, for answers. Here’s what she had to say.

The Cheat Sheet: How should you respond when someone you recently started dating doesn’t reply to your text?

April Masini: If you had one date and your partner doesn’t respond to your text, and doesn’t initiate any on his or her own, then they’re just not into you. Accept the rejection and be grateful that you have a sign. You don’t have to waste your energy on someone who’s not in it with you. Move on.

However, if you’ve had a couple of dates already, and if you’ve slept with them, and they don’t respond to your text, assume they didn’t see it. Some people get lots of texts and it’s easy for one to be missed or to accidentally be marked as “read.” So, wait a day or two and try them again. If there’s still nothing, check yourself. They may be doing their best to move on and not have the tools for proper closure—or if you still think it’s an oversight or that they’re sick or out of town, get offline and pick up the phone to give them a call. If you still get nothing, move on. It wasn’t a match.

CS: What are some things you should never do while waiting for a text?

AM: Don’t watch water boil, and don’t keep checking your phone for a response. If you obsess about a text, you’re going transfer that anxious energy to other parts of your life. So, keep busy and keep that text that hasn’t come in yet, in perspective. Try not to bank too much on a response. Keep perspective and try to focus on the flow of life—not on controlling it.

Don’t call all your friends and ask what you should do. I get it. You’re anxious. You want that person to respond. But you’re going to become a drag to your friends. So, use that energy to do something productive. Go to the gym, take a walk, go shopping, cook something—put your energy into another activity. Don’t dwell and dial. It’s going to turn you into ‘the boy who cried wolf’ for when you really do need advice!

CS: How can you keep yourself from becoming obsessed over the response time and watching your phone like a hawk?

AM: This is a matter of discipline. You have to find your balance. If you can discipline yourself not to check your phone obsessively, and have business as usual, great. But if you can’t, distract yourself with other means. A movie, a lunch date, making travel plans—whatever keeps your mind occupied so that you achieve your goal—of not being obsessed.

CS: At what point should you move on and forget about this person?

AM: If you’re dating someone who normally doesn’t respond, then this is just a quirk. But if not, this person is not responding to send you a message that they’re not interested, and not available for you. The second time they don’t respond to your texts is when you should move on.

I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt at first, because life happens. Who hasn’t missed a text that got lost in the shuffle of the day? I have. But if someone tries you a second time, and you still don’t respond, this isn’t someone who wants to date you or values your time. If he or she is an emergency room surgery, or has a parent in need of constant help, or is on a heli-skiing trip where there is no reception, that’s different. But after two episodes of non-response, take the hint and use your important energy elsewhere.

April Masini is a health and fitness advocate, TV and film producer, author of four books, and has the No.1 relationship advice forum. Masini is also a blue-chip corporate spokesperson and preferred go-to source for the world’s most prominent news outlets.

Read more: Signs Your Partner is Cheating on You

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There’s no denying finding true love is hard, but luckily for you an article on dating advice has resurfaced from the 1950s.

That’s right, ladies. Put down Tinder and cancel your plans for speed dating tonight as the article from a 1958 edition of American magazine McCall’s is doing the rounds on social media, and it’s guaranteed to find you a man.

And don’t worry, there’s not just one tip to follow so you can find a husband – in fact, there’s hundreds of them.

Credit: Facebook/McCall’s

So, where can you find him? McCall’s suggests purchasing a pooch so you accidentally bump into Mr Right while on a dog walk, or you could make your car break down at ‘strategic places’ so he can fix it for you.

If you’re really taking things seriously, the magazine suggests using census reports to find places with the most single men to give yourself the best chance possible.

In the 1950s, Neveda would be your go-to place, but more recent 2016 reports suggest it’s either London, Isles of Scilly, Suffolk or Cumbria.

Credit: Facebook/McCall’s

The magazine even advises analysing the obituaries in the local paper to find a widower as well as being friendly to ugly men as ‘handsome is as handsome does’.

And don’t forget to make sure your mates are attractive as ‘there might be some leftovers’, ladies.

It’s not just where you can find an eligible bachelor either, as there’s also ways you can make yourself noticed, like wearing a band-aid as ‘people always ask what happened’.

Credit: Facebook/McCall’s

Or, cry softly in the corner because your future-husband is bound to come over and ask if you are okay.

McCall’s even suggests attracting his attention by accidentally scattering the contents of your purse across the street (and risk being mugged) so he’ll come to your rescue.

There are a few tips on how to look good to him too.

Credit: Facebook/McCall’s

Credit: Facebook/McCall’s

Take care of your health as men don’t like women who are ill, don’t get sunburn, always order a rare steak, don’t whine, don’t be too fussy, and don’t even think about revealing any allergies.

Once you’ve found him and looked good, you need a way to land him.

Credit: Facebook/McCall’s

Learn to play poker, make your home comfortable for him and make sure you point out that the death rate of single men is twice of a married man.

And when all else fails, you can try a tip from the ‘wild ideas – anything goes’ column.

I’m off to ride to airport bus back and forth while I read the obituaries in the local paper.

Featured Image Credit: Facebook/McCall’s/Pixabay