Tag Archives: dating advice
We Asked, You Answered: What's It Like Dating With Endometriosis?
Dating as a perfectly healthy woman comes with enough challenges, but playing the dating game with endometriosis can be an absolute nightmare. Celebrities like Lena Dunham and Halsey to Julianne Hough, Jaime King, and Padma Lakshmi have all publicly revealed how endometriosis negatively impacted their relationships—and the disease equally cramps the love lives of average Janes.
New Jersey resident ShaVaughn Morris has Stage IV Endometriosis and PCOS. “In the beginning, I’d date periodically,” Morris tells The Blossom. “I’d get intimate with a partner, and then there would be a little pain and resistance because [my] adhesions are so prominent around the pelvic and uterine area.”
RELATED: Why Is Painful Sex so Hard to Talk About?
Morris, who is currently single, says she gets ultrasounds every quarter to check disease progression and with those check-ups come regular STD tests. “One positive of having endo is I always know my status because I’m getting checked by my doctor so frequently.”
Out of her struggles of dating with endo—including surgical scars across her belly—came Sayitwithsex.com, a blog that promotes a healthy, open dialogue about getting it on.
“Sometimes it becomes uncomfortable, having that sex conversation. I am sexually active, and I tell my partner they have to be gentle on me, because of my endo, because it can cause friction inside.”
And how have her partners handled that request?
“It really depends on the guy and where he is mentally and his maturity level. I’ve had guys buy me tea, and some have gotten me ice cream to feel better,” Morris added.
RELATED: Sex Tips for the Endo Girl
While her suitors have been amenable, her periods have not, and some have lasted “two to three weeks” long.
“It really is an interesting journey dating with endo and PCOS. My advice to other women out there dating with endo is, don’t be afraid, to be honest about where you are in your endo journey. Endo doesn’t make us who we are. It’s an extension of who we are.”
Sommer Rose, a 19-year-old Indiana-based undergrad, says she was diagnosed with endo in July, just as she met a new, and surprisingly supportive beau.
“I’m in a long distance relationship, and it seems like every time I visit my boyfriend, I start my cycle. It’s embarrassing the amount of time we’ve spent running to get an emergency stash of pads, chocolate and a [huge] amount of Advil,” said Rose. “I love being doubled over in pain unable to move—not!—when I get to see him after such long spans of time in between visits. He’s so sweet about it and lets me cry and yell about the pain. Even off my cycle when I get excruciating hip pain, he just understands and supports me.” Rose says she also suffers from PMDD, a severe, sometimes disabling extension of premenstrual syndrome, and Achalasia, a rare disorder that makes it difficult for food and liquid to pass into the stomach. “I’m blessed to have a guy who loves me—even with two chronic diseases—and still wants to have a future with me.”
Arielle Cole, a Delray Beach-based paralegal and gluten-free food blogger, was diagnosed with endometriosis at the age of 25 after being hospitalized more than five times over the past 13 years for her symptoms.
Now 27, she says you’ll have to make it past a few dates with her before she’ll dish about having the disease.
“It’s a little nerve-wracking dating with endo,” Cole says. “But with the power of the internet, it’s not as scary. I have found that most men don’t know about it, but some will research it after learning about it. I don’t tell people I’m dating about my endo though right away. I’ll probably wait a month and then bring it up. You definitely want to get to know a person a little more before feeling comfortable to mention it.”
Actress Juliet Ibrahim hands ladies a solution for cheating men
Ghanaian actress Juliet Ibrahim is known for always making controversial remarks on Instagram. Earlier, NAIJ.com reported how the diva advised people to sell their market well and not be shy of whatever hustle they are into.
In another recent post shared on Instagram, the actress took to advising ladies whose boyfriends cheat on. This was preceded by a caption in which she shared the story of a friend who was in love with a 51-year-old man.
In this post she shared, she went on to ask the age of the oldest man a lady can or should date: “A friend of mine who’s 23 just said she’s in love with a 51 year old man. Please Ladies, what’s the age of the oldest guy you would date?”
Several replies followed her caption but one particular comment by an Instagram user identified as amforeverosy stood out: “Maybe she’s about to make her cheating boyfriend, her stepson. *wink*”
READ ALSO: I have been ridiculed for embracing who I am – Juliet Ibrahim (photos)
This comment made by this individual must have made the social media influencer to thinks of this as the best punishment for a cheating boyfriend. She voiced her thought in her subsequent post where she advised ladies on what to do if their partners become rogues.
“Ladies, if your man cheating on you; dump him and date his father. Make that nigga your step son.”
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The fans of the actress who is also an thriving entrepreneur are becoming more familiar with the image of Juliet as a relationship expert and they seem to think this suggestion is by far a reasonable one.
However, a particular user saw her comment as an opportunity to rant about ladies and how they are not quite suitable for marriage.
itzmanuel_rioschatz: “On behalf of anything male in the world…both d married, unmarried, never married, useless, useful, mad… All of dem…we apologize for marrying you pple oo… We say it is no longer by force…we sef we re tired… I knw this must be coming from the MOST UNFORTUNATE FEMALE LIKE YOU…. #single.. Just bear in mind that choosing a girl to marry is not the best but a comparative badness… You see.. That u re just the worse of all…. M not saying I am good oo… #i am bad but like I said u re the worse abeg.”
What do you think about Juliet’s advice?
Omoni Oboli Interview: About the Nigerian Movie Industry | Star Chat | NAIJ.com TV
Source: Naija.ng
How do I be a 'Noble Badass' with Today's #metoo Movement?
Does the ‘me too’ movement mean your advice needs to be revised? Quite the opposite, reports Relationship Intimacy Expert, Allana Pratt…
Question: Allana, I watched your video called ‘3 ways to be a noble bad ass.’ Looking at today’s women and how they act incorporating today’s ‘me too’ movement, would you reanalyze the advice you’re giving to men, do you believe the advice provided is still usable or does it need to be adapted?
Answer: This is such a great question and really speaks to your integrity and wanting to be noble, present and aware. However, to me the movement only makes my advice more important than ever before.
A man’s in his nobility when he’s in his heart, conscious and present. When he’s spinning in his head in doubt, hesitancy or insecurity, he’s in fear and doesn’t act from his masculine grandeur.
The second part I referred to in that video was penetrating her with your eyes and awareness, your heart and kindness, and your pelvis and sacred sexual energy. Again, that hasn’t changed whatsoever. If anything this is the most important part.
Women that I know, coach and befriend…don’t want to be treated as a piece of meat, they want to be acknowledged as a work of art. They want to be protected and provided for, to be seen for their brilliance and their softness, they want to feel safe in your nobility, and they want to be opened wide, reverently ravished into surrender in their feminine energy, honored for the Goddess that they are.
The third piece was about was embracing your vulnerability. Conscious women can feel if you’re present, grounded and centered in your body… or if you’ve shut down, pulled away and are afraid to speak your truth. So vulnerability is more important now than ever.
And vulnerability is not a weakness but strength, it’s an authentic transparency where you put down your walls and deeply know one another while being deeply known by another. It’s what I believe we are deeply crave.
The ‘me too’ movement from my perspective is a real call for a man’s nobility and honoring of a woman’s sacred sexuality and an awakening of his grandeur that naturally desires to protect and provide safety, support and reverence for the feminine 🙂
In turn, I also coach women to see themselves as a work of art, not a piece of meat. To see their sexuality as sacred, not a manipulation, to soften, open and be grateful for a man’s support and appreciation, and while they can still accomplish, collaborate, choose and create magnificence… to also value the creative ideas, radiant inspiration and inspiring tenderness that is part of their true feminine nature and frankly… is the energy that heals the world.
Lean into challenge, be like iron in the fire.
Let the ‘me too’ movement bring out the best in you…
your respect for self, for women and for healthy thriving intimate relationships.
Huge blessings, Allana xoxo
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“Old school is the new school” – alternatives to finding a partner online
‘On screen romance’ used to mean film star couples, but nowadays it’s a more apt description of modern dating! When did meeting your significant other in real life become ‘old school’? Somehow in the last few years, the balance has tipped and daters are meeting the loves of their lives without even leaving the house. But we needn’t just rely on our phones to match us with our potential partners- after all you can’t beat real life chemistry! The team at new dating website, My Friend Charlie, organise events for London singles and share their best tips for finding your lobster.
Looking for a significant other?
1. Get introduced by a friend
Your friends know you better than anyone and can look objectively at people they know, setting you up with like-minded potential suitors. This is great for finding out a little more about someone before going straight in and meeting them- and is how people would date way back when! It is great to have a level of friendship with the person you are dating and meeting them through an existing friend is a good way to establish this. Everybody loves a love story and there’s nothing better than having a connection with someone the first time you meet.
2. Work on yourself first
Before getting out into the dating world it is a good idea to work on yourself first. For example, if you are going through some instability in your job or your home life is causing you stress, it can be a good idea to work through the bigger issues before making dating a priority. This way, you can put your energy into finding that special someone without taking your stresses and strains onto the date with you.
3. Look for dating events
Getting out and dating in the real world can be intimidating, especially if you have been living the single life for a while. Grab the bull by the horns and take a leap of faith by going along to a dating event- you never know where it could lead! My Friend Charlie host quirky events in London for singles, like comedy nights and food masterclasses. You might find your soulmate as a result of bonding over the perfect soufflé! The idea behind their events is to take dating back to a face-to-face experience, moving away from romances solely across a screen.
4. Join a club
If you don’t enjoy sport, going along to a tennis club to find the man of your dreams might not be the best use of your dating energies. Spend time doing things you enjoy, so you can meet like-minded people- they might end up being your soulmate! Joining clubs and making friends is a good way to find social events and get to know people in your area.
Think back to a time where your date would arrive at your front door, the butterflies and nerves that can only be associated with the first meeting. You would head to the local park and spend the afternoon eating picnic food and playing lawn games- Well, maybe our grandparents would have! My Friend Charlie are running a ‘picnic in the park and games’ event next month, so grab some single friends and take a trip back to the past!
5. Get out of your comfort zone
Whether that means going to a bar alone or arranging a group date and bringing someone you fancy, there are plenty of ways you can push your dating boundaries. Engaging in experiences that will push you out of your comfort zone are great for improving confidence and again, gives you the opportunity to meet your possible love interest in real life rather than online!
For more dating advice and information about My Friend Charlie, visit www.myfriendcharlie.co.uk
