Relationships Talk

THEY’RE better known for advice on cutlery etiquette and when how to address royalty but Debrett’s have waded in on the online dating scene.

The genteel company is offering advice to the over 50s on how to negotiate the tricky world of dating hook-ups in the 21st century.

Debrett’s want to help the silver surfers find love

Research has shown that almost a million over 50s would like to go on dating sites but have no idea how to ‘Swipe Right’ or meet people IRL (in real life).

The new online Guide to 50+ Dating — a collaboration between Debrett’s  and the Ourtime dating service for older people — is aimed at helping those who want to get back in the dating scene but “need a helping hand to get started”.

Here are some of the tips the new manual gives:

Polishing Your Profile

Ourtime found that 56 per cent of over 50s would use a photo that is over 10 years old to impress potential dates but Debrett’s warn against deception.

The guide advises that the profile picture should be “no more than a year old”.

It says “There’s no point trying to mislead your date if you ever hope to meet in person.”

Getty – Contributor

Nearly a million over 50s would be prepared to try online dating

Confidant Communication

Almost two-thirds of over 50s feel less confident now than when they were younger and almost half of women said they were too nervous to make the first contact with an online match.

Debrett’s advises women that it’s OK to make the first move.

It adds:  “Keep your first message light-hearted and brief, and make it personal: mentioning something you particularly like about a person’s profile will show that you’re singling them out.

“Don’t be creepy, though: it’s far too early for come-ons or innuendo.”

Make the Meeting Memorable

The manual advises that after five messages, “it makes sense to take the initiative and propose a date”.

It adds: “Tailor the date around a shared interest, like a visit to an exhibition.”

It also tells readers it’s fine to kiss on the first date.

It reads: “Modern romance often involves a briefer ‘courting’ period, so don’t feel you’re jeopardising future prospects if your instincts are telling you to throw caution to the wind”.

Getty – Contributor

Making the meeting memorable could be the key to success

The Follow Up

How long do you wait to message after the first date? This dilemma is one for all ages.

Debrett’s advises: “Strategic delay is not necessary” and says a friendly text message within 24 hours of meeting is the norm.

But “ghosting” is not polite.

It says: “It’s best to be honest from the outset and say how much you enjoyed meeting them, but that you would prefer to remain friends.”

Getting Closer

The guide includes a chapter on how to move things on after the first date.

According to Debrett’s, “After three or more dates, you will usually have a sense of whether or not you would like to make it exclusive”.

But if it doesn’t work out, Kate from Ourtime says, “Never give up, there are almost 1 million single over 50’s in the UK who are already online dating and waiting to meet someone new”.

Divorcee Karen recently revealed why she uses online dating at 53 – and said younger men were lining up to date her.

Catch up with our unlucky-in-love Tinderella’s latest antics here.